Who is a wise woman who understand God’s ways? A woman whose life is characterized by beauty, holiness, and honor. But she does not lord these characteristics over others, because she is constantly aware that these fruits come from the mercy of God in Christ through the powerful working of the Spirit in her life. She humbly reminds herself and others that she is dependent on her vine, Christ, to produce any fruit; and she always gives Him the glory for them. Because she is not focused on herself, her life is characterized by getting along with others.
In contrast, a woman who buys into earthly wisdom is bitterly jealous and always harbors envy in her heart. She is constantly comparing herself to others, and is never content with the work the Spirit is doing in her. The fruit He graciously and patiently produces in her is never good enough, because it does not accomplish her own selfish ambition of looking better than others, of using others to feed her own pride. She is constantly at war with others in her thoughts, her words, her attitude. She is resentful of others and curses them in her heart. Her involvement in relationships is hit-and-miss, depending on their conformity to her own purposes. Her fight for superiority is animal-like; she has unwittingly followed the same path as Satan and his demons.
However strong she may appear, deep down, the woman of earthly wisdom is constantly aware of her own short-comings, and she lives overwhelmed by them. She is controlled by shame and guilt. But her pride does not allow her to come clean with others about her sins and to seek godly help. Instead, she covers up what she knows to be true by lying and boasting about herself. She constantly tells herself and others that she is better than she really is; her life is a charade of godliness, exhausting to uphold. But it is humanly impossible to keep this up every day, so she ends up being hit-and-miss at best, two-faced and inconsistent. Her behavior only results in confusion and chaos; everything in her life constantly feels like it is all falling apart. Eventually, to maintain her masquerade, she will go to any length. At night, she will commit any secret sin in attempt to relieve her exhausted spirit; by day she will put up any defense to keep all the dominoes from falling down.
In contrast, the woman who accepts God’s wisdom is pure. She has a single focus, the pleasure of Jesus. She pursues Him single-mindedly, and trusts Him with any extraneous result. Because she knows that it is not her job to control the responses of others, she is transparent. She is real. She is refreshingly authentic. She is not ashamed of either her strengths or weaknesses, but uses them both to contribute lovingly and truthfully to her relationships. She is unshaken by either the positive or negative reactions of others, but receives them with grace and glory to her Savior. She does not seek the support of others at any cost, but rather she seeks peace at any cost. She is willing to do the hard work of getting along with others. She is gentle at all times, both in the face of support and rejection. She does not demand support from others, nor is dependent on it for her security. She is easily intreated, rebuked, and challenged. She is open to reason, open to suggestions, open to criticism, open to trying new things: she is vulnerable to others. She is submissive in her speech and attitude: she is not afraid of being hurt because her strength is in the One who loves her steadfastly. She is overflowing with mercy for others when their interactions with her are imperfect, and she is always ready to bestow a blessing upon her counterpart. She extends love to every person God brings into her life without partiality. She consistently treats each loved and created human being with dignity and honor. Unlike the woman of worldly wisdom, she does not filter people she meets through the grid of selfish gain, but rather accepts everyone as an opportunity to selflessly shower her blessings upon. She has nothing to hide, so her words to herself, God, and others are transparent. She has no need for hypocrisy and chooses to reject it, no matter how much this choice may humble her. Her eyes, words, body language, and tone communicate refreshing sincerity to every person she meets.
Peacemakers like the woman of godly wisdom daily plant seeds of peace. These seeds are beautiful in the sight of God, and from them He will produce the invaluable fruit of righteousness. Can you imagine such a merciful thing? God uses a humble, transparent, imperfect woman to produce the fruits of right relationship in herself and in those she touches. And not just right human relationships, but right relationship with Himself. Wow. What a gift. God uses her humble peacemaking to grow a vineyard of joyful, healthy, robust, guilt-free vines that grow together in community. Because of her patient submission to the work of the Spirit in her life, at the pace He chooses, the woman of godly wisdom is used by God to produce righteousness in His people.
Sabrina, choose to accept by faith God’s wisdom. Choose to pursue it at any cost. No matter how much transparency may hurt or humble at first, no matter how fearful or overwhelming its prospect may seem from your viewpoint now, its reward is exceedingly great. You were never designed to live in guilt, shame, or fear. You were designed and bought with a price to live in transparency as a vital piece of God’s family. You were set apart to encourage every one you meet as they relate to your weaknesses, are privileged to graciously help you, are challenged by your strengths, and are exalted to glorify Christ in all things. Let the Spirit flow freely in you, to change you at His own pace. Don’t force His timing because you wish you looked like someone else. Rejoice that He has you where you are at. Pray that He would change you into the image of Christ daily. And wherever you are, boldly extend yourself to love others with security that you are a jar of clay being formed in the loving hands of your Potter.
